110 Thought Provoking Questions for Couples


Date night just got interesting.


Whether you're in a brand-new relationship or have been together for years, we can almost guarantee that there are still things you've yet to learn about your partner. Even if you think you know every story, quirk, and foreplay move they've got, we went ahead and created a 110-question-long survey that we hope will either confirm your theory or help you learn just a little bit more about your lover. Since 2020, you've likely spent a lot of time with your person, unless you're in a long-distance relationship (but even then, you've probably logged an unprecedented amount of Zoom or FaceTime hours). Because of that, it's important for you to keep things feeling fresh, and as our wants and needs evolve, so should our relationships. That's why asking each other intimate, romantic, and thought-provoking questions can be a fun chance to bond, as well as check in with each other's visions for the future.


Some of our 110 questions will make you laugh, while others can improve your communication skills. Overall, the name of the game is to present the opportunity to learn more about your significant other, from their childhood and their views on love and marriage to how to keep them even happier in the bedroom. Consider creating a cozy space to share your answers and make a fun couples game of it during your next at-home date night. Another good idea is to bank these questions for later, asking a few at a time or on a rolling basis for when you're bored. Below are our first set of 110 good questions for couples to ask each other. Want even more? Check out our juicy never-have-I-ever questions, our delightfully dirty sex questions, and the We're Not Really Strangers card game and Relationship Expansion Pack, which contain 204 questions—all of which are designed to deepen your connection.


  1. Who was your first crush, and what were they like?
  2. Can you describe what your first heartbreak was like?
  3. What was the biggest lesson from your worst breakup?
  4. What's something you used to believe about relationships but no longer do?
  5. What's something surprising that you were afraid of as a child?
  6. What was your favorite food growing up?
  7. What's your favorite meal now?
  8. What was the first album you ever owned?
  9. How does your life compare to how you imagined it growing up?
  10. What was your dream job when you were a kid?
  11. Were you "popular" in high school?
  12. What was your favorite school subject growing up?
  13. Was there an embarrassing fashion moment in your adolescence?
  14. What's your definition of romance?
  15. Do you see yourself having kids? If so, how many?
  16. Do you believe in soul mates?
  17. If you believe in soul mates, do you think you've met yours?
  18. Do you believe in God?
  19. Is going to church or another house of worship important to you?
  20. Do you think it's more important to be smart or to be kind?
  21. Would you rather be loved, respected, or admired?
  22. Does your family have any traditions?
  23. Would you want to create any traditions in your family going forward?
  24. What do you think is your best quality?
  25. What qualities or character traits do you want to work on?
  26. What's one of my best qualities?
  27. What do you find sexiest about me?
  28. Have you ever been cheated on?
  29. Have you ever cheated on someone?
  30. How old were you when you lost your virginity?
  31. What was your first sexual experience like?
  32. Do you think infidelity is always a deal breaker, no matter what?
  33. Who is more trusting, you or me?
  34. Who is more inclined to be jealous, you or me?
  35. What's the first thing you noticed about me?
  36. What's the first thing you found attractive about me?
  37. Is there a personality trait that always ticks you off?
  38. How do you express anger?
  39. How do you hide anger when you don't want it to show?
  40. How do you talk yourself down from anger or frustration?
  41. Who is more of a risk-taker—you or me?
  42. Do you have a bucket list?
  43. If you had a bucket list, what would be on it?
  44. What's your dream vacation?
  45. Where would be your ideal place—or places—to live?
  46. Would you rather own a home you don't love or rent one you love?
  47. What's something you'd like to try doing but haven't worked up the nerve to yet?
  48. Would you rather be an amazing singer or an incredible dancer?
  49. What superpower do you wish you could have?
  50. What activity makes you feel the most joyful when you're doing it?
  51. What would you do with your life if you suddenly became a billionaire?
  52. Do you think there's such a thing as luck, or do we create our own outcomes?
  53. Who is more generous, you or me?
  54. Do you remember your dreams when you wake up?
  55. If so, do you ever dream about me?
  56. What's your favorite thing about our relationship?
  57. What's something you'd like for us to try?
  58. What's something not obviously sexual that turns you on?
  59. Do you have a sexual fantasy you've never shared with me before?
  60. If we could have sex anywhere, where would you choose?
  61. Would you rather have only morning sex for the rest of your life or strictly sex at night?
  62. What was your very first orgasm like?
  63. Have you ever faked an orgasm—not necessarily with me, but in general?
  64. How do you define great sex?
  65. Have you ever thought about me while masturbating?
  66. Does the idea of getting caught during sex excite you?
  67. Does the thought of someone watching us have sex excite you?
  68. When did you first want to kiss me?
  69. Is there a type of outfit or clothes you find sexy that you'd like to see me in?
  70. Do you like playing with sex toys, or would you like to try them as a couple?
  71. What's your favorite sex position?
  72. What's something you wish we did together more often?
  73. Where would you like to be touched more often?
  74. Who is more likely to survive the Hunger Games—me or you?
  75. Who is more likely to live through a zombie attack?
  76. How old were you when you stopped believing in the tooth fairy?
  77. How old were you when you stopped believing in Santa?
  78. Would you rather be a vampire or a werewolf?
  79. What historical era would you most, and least, want to go to?
  80. Who is your favorite couple in pop culture?
  81. Who was your first celebrity crush?
  82. Who's your "hall pass" celebrity crush today?
  83. Which of us has a better sense of direction?
  84. Which of us is a better driver?
  85. Do you think of yourself as an optimist or a pessimist?
  86. Do you believe that everything happens for a reason?
  87. Which musical artist would you want me to commission a love song from?
  88. Which song describes our love story best?
  89. Is there a song that makes you think of me?
  90. What animal would you choose to be in another life?
  91. What animal do you think I'd be?
  92. Do you believe in ghosts?
  93. Do you believe in reincarnation?
  94. Do you think people can really have psychic abilities?
  95. If you had the option to live forever, would you choose to?
  96. What's your favorite movie of all time?
  97. What's a song you could sing by heart to me, right now?
  98. Do you like to be surprised?
  99. Do you believe in astrological compatibility?
  100. How many times have you been in love?
  101. Have you ever been in a physical fight?
  102. Is there a personal goal you'd like to achieve in the next five years or so?
  103. Do you consider yourself good with money?
  104. Do you think there's such a thing as a "harmless" lie?
  105. What's the best trip you've ever taken?
  106. What's the worst trip you've ever taken?
  107. Is there a place you love that you'd like to show me one day?
  108. Would you rather live in only hot weather forever or only cold weather?
  109. Do you have a personal flaw you'd fix, if you could?
  110. Is there anything you've always wondered about me but have hesitated to ask?